Topic Tuesday #5 2012/08/21 "The Family Village"
It is said that it takes a village to raise a child. I always felt that was true, but I come from a standard model "Nuclear Family" with 2 children and a few pets somewhere in suburban America. Here in the "developed world" we have baby sitters and public education systems and all sorts of helping aids that make it possible to go 'alone' in parenting. I was fortunate and always had enough of whatever I needed. My sister is 10 years older than I am; I'm sure that made some things easier on my parents in some ways and of harder in others. I remember spending time with my grand-parents, aunts, uncles and cousins but I know that these were pretty few and, sometimes, far in between. I remember so well because they were special, not because they were plentiful. I suppose then that my village was not a large one. As I have grown older and been exposed to the world and had children of my own, the concept of the "the Family Village" has taken on a new importance to me. I have seen how developing nations and undeveloped third world cultures, nurture children among large groups and everyone is essentially a family; protected and cared for. My wife and I decided that raising children in an urban center an hour away from a family support structure was a mistake. We have since uprooted ourselves and moved closer to my family. Over the past few years, we have experienced an inward migration and now my sister lives just a mile from us, and my parents are in between us at only half a mile. Our Family Village is set and we see each other much more often and it gives my two girls a second and third place to call home and be safe. We have a safety net, and that is simply invaluable.
Now for the topic of conversation: What place does a Family Village serve in your lives? How have you gone about creating it or coping without it? Are your close friends an extension of your Village? I sure hope so. Tell us about it.
From Facebook
From Google +
Tony SandovalAug 21, 2012 (edited)
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| My Grandfather and I, just after his 95th Birthday |
Now for the topic of conversation: What place does a Family Village serve in your lives? How have you gone about creating it or coping without it? Are your close friends an extension of your Village? I sure hope so. Tell us about it.
From Facebook
Jim Mathews Family was the original village, ties of heredity that are impossible to break and last from birth till death. It's also as old as man himself..... You are geek, hear you roar??
Jon Jimenez When I lived in Venezuela, we had my grandparents, me and my sister, my aunt, and my aunt, uncle, and cousin living in one 3.5 bedroom apartment. This went on for many years. When me, mom and sis moved to the US, we moved in with my other aunt, uncle and cousins. Now that I've been here for a long while, I live an hour away from my family. I get the urge to move farther but I know that they are my strongest form of support and the people I love the most. I see them mostly only on holidays and bdays.
Although ive made good friends and created momentarily extended families, I have a hard time keeping people close to me. I don't know why.
So to me, family is the most important thing. It's a base and what keeps me grounded. It's what I search for when looking for new friends, and what I like to call people whenever I feel like I fit in. Unfortunately, like I said, I'm still kind of a loaner most times. Don't know how to change it.August 21 at 1:30pm via mobile ·
Andy Cowen Jon, you just haven't found what you need yet. Keep looking, but don't forget the things you learn along the way.
Jim, ROAR. Not sure why I roared... But it is cathartic. Everyone should roar and howl from time to time.August 21 at 1:58pm · · 3
From Google +
Tony SandovalAug 21, 2012 (edited)
I grew up in South Omaha. Still live here. back then I had relatives who lived scattered about up to a mile away but always nearby.
If I was to be walking up the block to visit a friend of mine, I was guaranteed to pass at least 2 relatives and several long time neighbors
If I happened to be getting myself into trouble out and about, those same folks would scold and kick my butt all the way home where I would REALLY get the meaning of the words "in trouble".
To me, that's what is meant by "A village to raise a child".
Having those people living in proximity to you to reinforce family values and expectations, etc...
Now, for my kids, a lot of family members have moved away and my kids don't have the same family /neighborhood like that.
to make up somewhat for that, in my opinion anyway, being a part of a church/school community allows for somewhat of the interaction of kids being able to interact with trusted and known adults who see kids and one kid is the same as the other , they look out for them all.
it's not quite the same as being able to wander the neighborhood like I used to do, but by making an effort to participate in activities and events gives as much similar as possible.
If I was to be walking up the block to visit a friend of mine, I was guaranteed to pass at least 2 relatives and several long time neighbors
If I happened to be getting myself into trouble out and about, those same folks would scold and kick my butt all the way home where I would REALLY get the meaning of the words "in trouble".
To me, that's what is meant by "A village to raise a child".
Having those people living in proximity to you to reinforce family values and expectations, etc...
Now, for my kids, a lot of family members have moved away and my kids don't have the same family /neighborhood like that.
to make up somewhat for that, in my opinion anyway, being a part of a church/school community allows for somewhat of the interaction of kids being able to interact with trusted and known adults who see kids and one kid is the same as the other , they look out for them all.
it's not quite the same as being able to wander the neighborhood like I used to do, but by making an effort to participate in activities and events gives as much similar as possible.