Topic Tuesday #174 2015/11/17 "Happy Birthday to ME!!!"

Google gave me a doodle for my birthday,

Today I am 37 years old. I would have taken the day off, but a guy at work has the same birthday and took it before I did. Dibs on next year! So I worked a full day driving for 6 hours and doing 2 hours of actual work. Once I got home, I made my own cake, devil's food this year. I shampooed carpets to get rid of cat mess (he's not liking the food or some reason). I did several loads of other people's laundry; I will get to mine eventually. I read stories to my children and then collapsed for a little bit since the shampooer atomizes the cleaning solution and it seizes up my lungs something terrible. I don't recall birthdays being quite so... responsible? before. It's funny how life creeps up on you and the daily grind cannot be easily ignored.

Once upon a time, while running role playing games, I suggested doing a persona game, where everyone would write up themselves, into a character sheet. We had a little game with chopping wood, throwing things, standing and running long jumps, and basically lifting heavy things. Then we would take an average of what other people thought our stats were. It was all in good fun and we were nothing if not kind to each other. So, In being kind but realistic, I thought I would revisit my stats. These are based on the AD&D 3.5 edition, now the Pathfinder rule system should you be curious.

Strength - 11
Dexterity - 10
Constitution - 8
Intelligence - 14
Wisdom - 16
Charisma - 15

Yeah, that's about right I think. 10 is pretty average, and physically I feel more average than mentally. I can perform stupid feats of strength when required, but I tend to get sick a little more often than others. I'm not the best judge of my own abilities however, so if you think I'm wrong, let me know and provide your own stats too!

Topic Tuesday #170 2015/10/20 "Sanity Dispenser"

Whew... That was weird. I was sitting at my kitchen counter, deleting apps from my phone since it was screwing up really bad, you know like ya do... then I had a moment. It was a fleeting moment but it was a staggering one, sobering even. I was momentarily overcome by the immensity of my life. I felt very small and overwhelmed. The walls came closing in as the hair on the back of my neck prickled and my ears felt hot. My breathing vacillated between holding my breath and nearly gasping hurriedly. I suppose this was the border of a panic attack. I have never had a panic attack before but I have had depression so when something in my personal eco system changes dramatically like this I take notice and analyze the hell out of it. I knew that I still needed to do this weekly post that you are reading now, and it occurred to me that I needed to write about this little glimpse of my own mindset. I went to get a keyboard for my tablet as I'm being weird and avoiding my desktop and laptop for a little while just working mobile (just because, no real reason). While I got the keyboard I saw the bathroom renovation that has been my bane for the last year and I knelt down and played with the tile for moment to figure out if I liked that pattern. This little ADHD moment was actually a little zen like. I was calmed from my overwhelmed state and may have made a decision on the tile. Then I carried on to this post right here.

It occurs to me, I may not be a normal person. Yeah I know you are shocked by this revelation, just as sarcastically as I. But, maybe this is my own defense system. When life gets me down or starts to overtake me, instead of trying to focus on everything all at once (an impossible task/burden) I focus on small things I can do at the moment and move from one of those to the next, making incremental changes in my wake. So, now I know more clearly, "hey, life is getting pretty big and scary, better just go do something productive to get your mind straight."
So, back to the job jar; my little sanity dispenser.

Stolen from http://www.lightbulbbooks.com/blog/2013/11/job-jar-for-tots/

P.S. We are all supposed to be in the future as of 10/21. Pretty sweet eh? Where is my hoverboard and flying car though?